Because Your Arms Are Too Short
You know the feeling. That one unreachable spot right in the middle of your back. You twist, you turn, you contort like a human pretzel—only to admit defeat and aggressively rub against a doorframe like a confused grizzly bear. But no more! Introducing the Automatic Back Scratcher 3000, the cutting-edge invention that guarantees instant itch relief with zero awkward furniture interactions.
Equipped with patent-pending robo-fingers, this high-tech marvel adjusts to your scratch intensity needs:
🪶 Gentle Breeze Mode – Like a butterfly softly tickling your skin (for when you just think you’re itchy).
🦅 Eagle Talon Mode – For those deep, satisfying scratches that make you question your existence.
🛠 Lumberjack Fury Mode – Not responsible for minor property damage.
But wait, there’s more! The Automatic Back Scratcher 3000 is AI-powered (because everything has AI now). It remembers your favorite scratch zones, provides random surprise scratches throughout the day, and even whispers encouraging phrases like, “You deserve this, champ.”
Whether you’re a chronic itcher, a back-scratching enthusiast, or just someone tired of asking strangers for help, the ABS 3000 is here to revolutionize your scratching experience. Order now and receive a free emergency scratch extender arm—for those moments when your robot assistant takes a well-deserved break. Scratch smarter, not harder! 🚀